Margus Meigo
Really Really informativ,e thank You!
1 November 2016 23:15
Aggie Sez
Welcome to the Solo Polyamory Facebook group, Margus.
I’m one of the moderators of the group.
WHAT IS SOLO POLYAMORY? People who practice solo polyamory have lots of kinds of honest, mutually consensual nonexclusive relationships (from casual and brief to long-lasting and deeply committed). But generally, what makes us solo is that we do not have (and many of us don't even want or aren't actively seeking) a conventional primary-style or nesting relationship -- sharing a household and finances with an intimate partner, identifying strongly as a couple/triad, etc.
WHAT SOLO POLYAMORY IS NOT: A common mistake is to assume that “solo poly” means simply that you embark upon dating/relationships as an individual -- as opposed to people in a primary-style relationship who prefer (or insist on) dating “as a couple.” Also, nonhierarchical polyamory is not the same thing as solo poly, although there is a lot of overlap. The main differentiator is: If you are in a primary/nesting-style relationship, you’re probably *not* solo poly. (Of course, there is a lot of gray area around that.)
It’s perfectly fine to join and participate in this group if you don’t identify as solo poly. Just please respect that solo polyamory (not polyamory or relationships in general) is the focus of our group. We encourage you to make use of this space as a learning environment about solo polyamory. Feel free to read the discussions here and ask relevant questions.
If you prefer to lurk for a bit first and read past discussions, that’s fine. But if you decide to introduce yourself, please say a bit about what brings you here, why you've joined this particular group. Do you consider yourself solo poly? Tell us a bit about your experience, or why you're interested in learning more about or discussing solo polyamory.
GROUP GUIDELINES: We do have a couple (of) general policies for participating in this group:
- Stay on topic.
- Don’t be creepy/rude.
We try to keep things on topic here. Therefore, all new posts are reviewed and approved by the moderators -- to make sure every thread offers clear relevance to solo polyamory, and to keep out spam, trolls, and vitriol/stereotypes.
If you haven't already done so, please read the "about" page for this group, as well as our guidelines on what is/is not OK to post in this group:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vkPBIvk6pu8IxVfcexKaZDbFDo8h68yULj9t8zLcXmU/edit?usp=sharing
WE HAVE A POLL! Generally, the moderators wish to understand the composition of this group. If you'd like to indicate whether you consider yourself solo poly, or other key identifiers for how you do relationships, feel free to take this poll and check off all options that apply:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/solopoly/permalink/540769082772735/?qa_ref=qd
It is NOT OK to treat this discussion group as a pickup joint where you can hit on potential partners, dates, “thirds,” sexual hookups, additions to your poly family etc. It’s great when our members strike up their own friendships/connections with each other sparked by discussions in the group -- and we encourage that! Participating in public discussions here, including “liking” posts and comments, is probably the best (and least potentially creepy/annoying) way to begin those connections.
However, we do warn, and sometimes will ban, members who hit on or proposition other members inappropriately, or who send friend requests or private messages to people with whom they have not otherwise interacted. If you receive such unwelcome attention, please screenshot that interaction (including the username of the member who approached you) and send it to one of the moderators. We will take action as warranted.
IF YOU’RE BRAND NEW TO POLYAMORY and seeking general information about it, here are a few basic resources that we recommend:
https://medium.com/@adampowers/the-coffee-break-polyamory-primer-6c64b4dc53de#.4i7c6rnuw
http://www.lovemore.com/poly/what-is-polyamory/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201309/what-polyamory-is-and-what-it-is-not
http://polyliving.net/glossary/
If you’re seeking information on how to meet poly people, here’s some practical advice:
https://polypretzels.wordpress.com/2016/05/25/9-ways-to-meet-polyamorous-people/
http://multiamory.libsyn.com/69-how-to-meet-polyamorous-people-in-real-life (Podcast episode, click the “pod” logo at top right for streaming or download options. Fast forward 11 minutes into the episode.)
If you have any questions or comments about this group, please feel free to ask any of the moderators via FB message.
Thanks!
I’m one of the moderators of the group.
WHAT IS SOLO POLYAMORY? People who practice solo polyamory have lots of kinds of honest, mutually consensual nonexclusive relationships (from casual and brief to long-lasting and deeply committed). But generally, what makes us solo is that we do not have (and many of us don't even want or aren't actively seeking) a conventional primary-style or nesting relationship -- sharing a household and finances with an intimate partner, identifying strongly as a couple/triad, etc.
WHAT SOLO POLYAMORY IS NOT: A common mistake is to assume that “solo poly” means simply that you embark upon dating/relationships as an individual -- as opposed to people in a primary-style relationship who prefer (or insist on) dating “as a couple.” Also, nonhierarchical polyamory is not the same thing as solo poly, although there is a lot of overlap. The main differentiator is: If you are in a primary/nesting-style relationship, you’re probably *not* solo poly. (Of course, there is a lot of gray area around that.)
It’s perfectly fine to join and participate in this group if you don’t identify as solo poly. Just please respect that solo polyamory (not polyamory or relationships in general) is the focus of our group. We encourage you to make use of this space as a learning environment about solo polyamory. Feel free to read the discussions here and ask relevant questions.
If you prefer to lurk for a bit first and read past discussions, that’s fine. But if you decide to introduce yourself, please say a bit about what brings you here, why you've joined this particular group. Do you consider yourself solo poly? Tell us a bit about your experience, or why you're interested in learning more about or discussing solo polyamory.
GROUP GUIDELINES: We do have a couple (of) general policies for participating in this group:
- Stay on topic.
- Don’t be creepy/rude.
We try to keep things on topic here. Therefore, all new posts are reviewed and approved by the moderators -- to make sure every thread offers clear relevance to solo polyamory, and to keep out spam, trolls, and vitriol/stereotypes.
If you haven't already done so, please read the "about" page for this group, as well as our guidelines on what is/is not OK to post in this group:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vkPBIvk6pu8IxVfcexKaZDbFDo8h68yULj9t8zLcXmU/edit?usp=sharing
WE HAVE A POLL! Generally, the moderators wish to understand the composition of this group. If you'd like to indicate whether you consider yourself solo poly, or other key identifiers for how you do relationships, feel free to take this poll and check off all options that apply:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/solopoly/permalink/540769082772735/?qa_ref=qd
It is NOT OK to treat this discussion group as a pickup joint where you can hit on potential partners, dates, “thirds,” sexual hookups, additions to your poly family etc. It’s great when our members strike up their own friendships/connections with each other sparked by discussions in the group -- and we encourage that! Participating in public discussions here, including “liking” posts and comments, is probably the best (and least potentially creepy/annoying) way to begin those connections.
However, we do warn, and sometimes will ban, members who hit on or proposition other members inappropriately, or who send friend requests or private messages to people with whom they have not otherwise interacted. If you receive such unwelcome attention, please screenshot that interaction (including the username of the member who approached you) and send it to one of the moderators. We will take action as warranted.
IF YOU’RE BRAND NEW TO POLYAMORY and seeking general information about it, here are a few basic resources that we recommend:
https://medium.com/@adampowers/the-coffee-break-polyamory-primer-6c64b4dc53de#.4i7c6rnuw
http://www.lovemore.com/poly/what-is-polyamory/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201309/what-polyamory-is-and-what-it-is-not
http://polyliving.net/glossary/
If you’re seeking information on how to meet poly people, here’s some practical advice:
https://polypretzels.wordpress.com/2016/05/25/9-ways-to-meet-polyamorous-people/
http://multiamory.libsyn.com/69-how-to-meet-polyamorous-people-in-real-life (Podcast episode, click the “pod” logo at top right for streaming or download options. Fast forward 11 minutes into the episode.)
If you have any questions or comments about this group, please feel free to ask any of the moderators via FB message.
Thanks!
2 October 2016 17:44