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Onion SportsDome has moved to Tuesdays 8/7c, so you can get your Dome 2.5 hours earlier. Glee won't know what hit them.

Plus, commercial spots are selling for hundreds of dollars to companies looking to advertise their tire shops and commemorative coins to hundreds of deadbeats and shut-ins who watch the Pro Bowl.

Tune in to IFC this Friday at 10pm / 9pm Central Time for the premiere of Onion News Network.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7NqxNpCtss

As the nation’s number-one source for breaking news, screaming political arguments and vital information on missing teenage Caucasian girls, Onion News Network boasts more attack satellites than any other news organization and no other channel has more secret surveillance cameras in homes, businesses, and high-level government offices. Onion News Network is truly the most powerful name in news.

Programming includes Today Now! for morning news to ease you softly into your day, Washington This Afternoon and the Cressbeckler Stance for astute political commentary, Star Fix for obsessive coverage of celebrity and entertainment events, Cross Examination with Shelby Cross for tracking the latest legal cases, and In The Know for no-holds-barred debate.

Onion News Network will showcase the network’s top-rated prime time show, a hyperactive graphics and sound effect-laden news explosion called "FactZone with Brooke Alvarez," hosted by the world’s most respected news-reader.

FDA Official: "Just Eat A Goddamn Vegetable"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOyebcrVWb4

Follow the show: http://facebook.com/OnionNewsNetwork

Subscribe to the iTunes Season Pass, and never miss an episode: http://onion.com/onIFCtv

Sports are finally about to get the attention they deserve. Starting this Tuesday, America's finest news source will bring viewers the most intense televised sports news program in recorded human history. 'Onion SportsDome,' a rundown of the finest in sports news, analysis, scores, highlights, rumor-mongering and petty personal attacks, premieres Tuesday, January 11 at 10:30 p.m. ET/PT on Comedy Central.

http://facebook.com/OnionSportsDome

Starting today, and running throughout the week, we reveal The Onion 20, a People Of The Year list with some goddamned integrity. If you are fucking obsessed with lists, visit http://theonion.com/ all week

Here is the link to purchase in HD. Multiple viewings are recommended.

http://theonion.com/r/futurenews

While other media outlets bring you news as it happens, only the Onion News Network has the power to bring you the news before it happens.

With our state-of-the-art wormhole satellites, we can now transmit Onion News Network broadcasts from the year 2137.